Yes, I'm still alive. I apologize for the long lapse in posts, I really do! It's just that rejoining the working world has made a significant dent in my free time, and after a long day waitressing my brain doesn't often feel up to working in the evenings. BUT it's a Saturday, and that means that tomorrow is my one day off, so I feel up to the challenge...
Here's a summary of the highlights of my past few weeks:
1. Going out to an Afrikaans bar/club and learning how to Sokkie dance. Think hoards of 18-year-old Jersey shore hybrid guys (with a blonde mullet instead of the spiky brown do) sporting tight tank tops spinning their dance partner around in an old-fashioned style two-step dance to popular Afrikaans dance music. Way more fun than dancing in American bars! But also way harder. There I was, learning to dance, obviously quite the amateur, with my (female) friend Isabeau, among all of these other couples who appeared practically semi-pro compared to me. I quickly had to stop caring what an idiot I looked like!
2. Getting a R200 tip on a R160 bill from an astoundingly generous Canadian couple. I now love Canadians.
3. Expanding my repetoire of South African food: "pap and stew", crayfish, abalone cakes, freshly-caught mussels, and braai-broodjies. Pap is a very traditional cooked cornmeal dish, like a finer and softer polenta. Very nice with boerewors and tomato stew. The abalone cakes tasted similar to fish cakes, only way more salty, and the mussels of course were divine. Braai-broodjies are barbequed toasted sandwiches, with cheese, onion, and tomato. How can you go wrong? (minus the tomato)
4. Stalling 3 times in a row at a stop street because I didn't realize my flip flop kept getting caught. Oops! I now drive barefoot, and haven't stalled again since.
5. Playing tennis almost every day.
6. Learning my first real Afrikaans phrase: "Ek het baie geloop" which means "I walked a lot". I use it nearly every day when I get home and am tired from being on my feet all day. But, doesn't come in very useful when about 75% of the time customers start speaking to me in Afrikaans, and 100% of the time they're not talking about walking...
7. Nearly dropping a tray with 3 glasses of ice, and 3 bottles of water on a small boy's head. "Nearly" is the key word here, but I still about had a heart attack. Also, so far I've broken 1 antique plate and 1 wine glass. Not a train wreck, but that loud crashing noise is now my worst nightmare.
8. Getting an amazing album of messages and photos from my family and friends for Christmas- best, and most unexpected, present ever!
And there you have it. Other than trying to avoid endangering small children's lives at work and playing tennis, I throw the tennis ball with Leo the dog on the beach, and go for occasional swims in the ocean. In the evenings after work, I hang out with the Kritzingers for a bit, write emails, and then go to bed! That's a day in the life of Marg the waitress, in the beautiful town of Jeffreys Bay.
Happy New Year's everyone!
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
And how would you like your eggs cooked?
Yes, I'm now a waitress. I've crossed over into the mysterious land of food service, and I've become one of them. Yes, I've become one of those people who weight our aprons with so many pens, notepads, mints, and towels that we appear to be carrying a small child in our pockets. A small, bulgy child. One of those people who shout for joy on the inside when they see a large, nicely-dressed group of people sit in their section, and have to contain their grin when the pricey alcohol orders start flowing. One of those people who think, "I won't write it down, I'll remember that, it's just an English Breakfast and 2 double cappachinos"...and then shamefacedly has to traipse back to the table to double check the order because we're second-guessing ourselves. And even better, because I'm still new, I'm also now one of those people who when questioned, recommends dishes to a customer that I've never even tried. But hey, the menu description sounds delicious!
Today was my first real day as a waitress, no more training or baby steps, I had a normal section to myself. Yesterday I had a small section of only 3 tables, and over the course of the whole day made a measly 53 rand. Which, when converted to dollars, is about $8 or so. For 9 hours of work...yeah. The problem is that here in South Africa, the convention is to only tip 10%, and I only got 6 or 7 tables the whole day. I just try and avoid converting the money into dollars, because that's when things get depressing. On the bright side, I do spirit away a few handfuls of Endearmints away with me at the end of the day, which I guess might add about $2 onto my total yield, but still, that's not much. The "season" rush that everybody at the restaurant has been talking about (aka freaking out about) apparently hasn't hit yet, but when it does I've been told that we'll enter the tip promise land, so that's exciting.
The language barrier hasn't been much of a problem so far. I'd say about 75% of customers start off by speaking to me in Afrikaans, and after the blank look on my face and my polite "pardon?" they repeat themselves in English. About a third of all my tables ask me where I'm from, or inquire about my accent, which on one hand is nice, because I can chat a bit with the customer (better tips!) but on the other hand if I'm running around with things to do, discussing my family history and holiday plans etc. can be a little too time consuming. I have come across 2 Americans in the last few days, and we always bond, so that's been nice. Barbara from Colorado and Jodi from Georgia, both married to South Africans and living here, believe it or not. I do enjoy hearing that familiar twang, I have to say.
The problem with working in a restaurant that doubles as a bakery is that all day I'm surrounded by fresh bread and assorted desserts that slowly revolve in a glass display case. At times I feel like I'm a dog who's mesmerized by a meaty hamburger, except that what I'm drooling over is a chocolate strawberry cheesecake or chocolate ganache cupcake. Each time I walk past the baker on my way to drop off dirty dishes in the kitchen, and I catch a glimpse of what she's working on, the decadence of her creations almost stop me in my tracks. Well, sometimes I do stop in my tracks, actually, and am occasionally rewarded with a taste or an off-cut. But not very often. We are allowed to eat a "lunch" of bread and butter, so in a snatched moment when I don't have any tables, or my customers are busy eating, I go and slice myself a door-stop piece of ciabatta or fresh brown bread to eat in the back. The only problem with this is that in the last week, my dietary stable has become bread. Bread for lunch, and free bread left at the end of the day as part of my dinner. Thank goodness we don't get any desserts for free, or I'd really be in trouble!
Even though I'm definitely still a novice, and have a lot to learn, I haven't made any terrible mistakes yet. Well, now that I say that, I'll probably really put my foot in it tomorrow. But the worst I've done is walk up to a table when you think they're finished with their coffee to ask if they'd like more, and their cup is still half full, I just couldn't see it. Then, you're standing there awkwardly, cursing yourself, and are forced to say something lame like, "is everything alright?" because it's next to impossible to see how full a coffee cup is unless you're standing right next to it. I think this happens to all of the waiters though, however experienced. Another good one is walking up to collect the bill when they haven't put anything in it yet. Oops, that's awkward. If it's closed, how was I supposed to know?! But anyhow, you live and you learn!
Today was my first real day as a waitress, no more training or baby steps, I had a normal section to myself. Yesterday I had a small section of only 3 tables, and over the course of the whole day made a measly 53 rand. Which, when converted to dollars, is about $8 or so. For 9 hours of work...yeah. The problem is that here in South Africa, the convention is to only tip 10%, and I only got 6 or 7 tables the whole day. I just try and avoid converting the money into dollars, because that's when things get depressing. On the bright side, I do spirit away a few handfuls of Endearmints away with me at the end of the day, which I guess might add about $2 onto my total yield, but still, that's not much. The "season" rush that everybody at the restaurant has been talking about (aka freaking out about) apparently hasn't hit yet, but when it does I've been told that we'll enter the tip promise land, so that's exciting.
The language barrier hasn't been much of a problem so far. I'd say about 75% of customers start off by speaking to me in Afrikaans, and after the blank look on my face and my polite "pardon?" they repeat themselves in English. About a third of all my tables ask me where I'm from, or inquire about my accent, which on one hand is nice, because I can chat a bit with the customer (better tips!) but on the other hand if I'm running around with things to do, discussing my family history and holiday plans etc. can be a little too time consuming. I have come across 2 Americans in the last few days, and we always bond, so that's been nice. Barbara from Colorado and Jodi from Georgia, both married to South Africans and living here, believe it or not. I do enjoy hearing that familiar twang, I have to say.
The problem with working in a restaurant that doubles as a bakery is that all day I'm surrounded by fresh bread and assorted desserts that slowly revolve in a glass display case. At times I feel like I'm a dog who's mesmerized by a meaty hamburger, except that what I'm drooling over is a chocolate strawberry cheesecake or chocolate ganache cupcake. Each time I walk past the baker on my way to drop off dirty dishes in the kitchen, and I catch a glimpse of what she's working on, the decadence of her creations almost stop me in my tracks. Well, sometimes I do stop in my tracks, actually, and am occasionally rewarded with a taste or an off-cut. But not very often. We are allowed to eat a "lunch" of bread and butter, so in a snatched moment when I don't have any tables, or my customers are busy eating, I go and slice myself a door-stop piece of ciabatta or fresh brown bread to eat in the back. The only problem with this is that in the last week, my dietary stable has become bread. Bread for lunch, and free bread left at the end of the day as part of my dinner. Thank goodness we don't get any desserts for free, or I'd really be in trouble!
Even though I'm definitely still a novice, and have a lot to learn, I haven't made any terrible mistakes yet. Well, now that I say that, I'll probably really put my foot in it tomorrow. But the worst I've done is walk up to a table when you think they're finished with their coffee to ask if they'd like more, and their cup is still half full, I just couldn't see it. Then, you're standing there awkwardly, cursing yourself, and are forced to say something lame like, "is everything alright?" because it's next to impossible to see how full a coffee cup is unless you're standing right next to it. I think this happens to all of the waiters though, however experienced. Another good one is walking up to collect the bill when they haven't put anything in it yet. Oops, that's awkward. If it's closed, how was I supposed to know?! But anyhow, you live and you learn!
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
The Spaz Bus
Hello from Jeffreys Bay! Or Jeffreysbaai as I should say. On Monday, I took an eventful bus trip from Cape Town to Jeffreys, and have been enjoying my last 2 days off before I start my waitressing job tomorrow. The trip by car I think would take no longer than 8 hours, and by bus was supposed to take 12 hours max. Lo and behold, I arrived in J Bay after 14 hours! I traveled on a Baz Bus, a South African backpackers bus, which is a 22-seater bus that transports backpackers, or anyone who wants really, to various hostels throughout the country. I decided to take this bus because I'd heard good things about it, and also liked the idea of meeting other foreign young people along the way. And yes, I definitely did get my money's worth in amusement alone. Let me describe it for you...
The cast of characters:
-Gavin the bus driver- happy-go-lucky guy with an Afrikaans accent, no teeth on the top, and a full row of shiny teeth on the bottom (dentures?) Which is weird because he appeared to be in his 40's. But anyhow, he was sporting a robust beer boep, complete with a tight and slightly holey t-shirt. Opening line to the passengers: "Hello guys! I just want to tell you my bus is the LOOOVE bus, because we all talk to each other and make friends!" He then threw in "I'm a BAD bus driver, not a BAZ bus driver" and then laughed very hard at his own joke.
-Lars the brooding German- computer programmer dressed only in black. From Berlin, in SA for 2 weeks by himself on a holiday.
-The Chatty Dutchman- (I didn't catch his name, I was too busy trying not to get trapped into a 2 hour long conversation) who was wearing a sparkly, brown plaid fedora and to go with his thick brown sideburns. I swear I'm not exaggerating. Spent the last year in Cape Town studying real estate, is going back to Holland soon. I didn't know people studied real estate. It took me most of the day to figure out why his voice sounded so familiar, and then I realized he sounds like Brad Pitt in Troy. I think. He talked so much I had plenty of time to mull it over.
-The Beach Blonde Austraaahlian girl- works at a bridal magazine in Australia, is in South Africa visiting her mom and grandma. Was traveling to Knysna by herself to take a break from her family, who apparently are too slow-paced for her. Unfortunately was trapped sitting up front with Gavin and the chatty Dutchman, but based on the amount she also talks, she definitely held her own. Is dating a surfer.
-The gaggle of German girls- very pale-skinned, animated group that chattered away in German for 4 or 5 hours straight, pretty much the entire time they were on the bus. I unfortunately have no idea what they were talking about or who they were.
-The gaggle of Austraaahlian girls- in SA for their old flatmate's wedding, decided to see a bit of South Africa afterwards. The one I was sitting by is an ex-travel agent for musical celebrities, apparently a very exhausting and stressful job. On their way to Oudtshoorn to see the ostriches.
-Tom Cruise- an American guy who looked and acted a lot like I imagine Tom Cruise would in person. Short statured, with big muscles (to compensate?) and brown spiky hair. From Chicago. Very loud and stereotypically American, but didn't turn out to be that friendly. By the time the bus picked him up, we were 2 1/2 hours late, so I can understand why.
-Possibly stoned couple- white American gangsta-lookalike guy, with an African girl sporting an afro that stood out at least a foot from her head. Again, I'm not exaggerating. Very out of it, fond of leaning against buildings on our gas station stops.
-The not so chatty Dutchman- an 18-year old blonde kid who looked like he was straight out of Orange County, but is actually from Holland. Smokes. Is in South Africa for 5 months, like me, visiting family during his gap year after high school. In his words, he "couldn't take any more school". I told him I felt the same way.
Lots going on, lots to see, but also took forever. The beach blonde Austraahlian girl said that we could have made a reality show about the Spaz (um, Baz) Bus, and she's right. The big drama of the day centered around one particular passenger that we were supposed to pick up in Mossel Bay, but when we got there there was no space for him. So Gavin, being a gracious and accomodating host, seats the sunburned, barefoot man on the floor in the aisle. Buut then he calls the "office" to let them know, and once we're 20 minutes away the "office" informs Gavin that he may lose his job, and therefore must drive the extra passenger all the way back to Mossel Bay. So we drive back, to drop the poor soul off again. The whole time during which Gavin is apologizing profusely and pleading with the passengers not to hate him. But by this time we're over an hour late.
And then leaving sunburned man in our dust, 40 minutes later we reach George. Gavin gets a call that he must now go back and pick up sunburned man AGAIN in Mossel Bay, because the "office" doesn't want to have to pay for him to stay an extra night. So Gavin left us in George to fend for ourselves, and drove back for a second time. Thank goodness we didn't have to go along for the ride, or Gavin may have had a mutiny on his hands. The whole point of a bus trip is to go TOWARDS your destination, not AWAY from it! But anyway, along with the chatty and not so chatty Dutchmen, the beach blonde Austraaahlian girl, and a few others I went to have dinner at Nandos, a chicken place. Which ended up working out, because we could all chat. And also, by then, I was in desperate need of a cup of tea, seeing as I'm an addict now and all.
Over an hour later, Gavin fiiinallly gets back with sunburned man, and we all load in and we're off! And then we realize that possibly stoned couple was no longer with us. They had accidentally gotten back on the wrong bus, the shuttle that was meant for sunburned man. And we still had their luggage. Suckaas! We didn't go back for them, whew.
So now running 2 1/2 hours late, we then passed the rest of the torturous 5 hours or so of the trip listening to Gavin's favorite CD, Lionel Richie love songs. Terrible, terrible music. Thank goodness for ipods, is all I can say. Eventually, at 10:30 pm, I finally made it to Jeffreys Bay, by which time Tom Cruise was so ansy that he kept shouting things like "ready to go?" or "everybody in?" each time we stopped a hostel and things were moving a little slow for his liking. All in all an entertaining journey, which I will definitely remember for a long, long time.
So there you have it! I'm undecided as to whether I want to take the Spaz bus back to Cape Town at the end of my month in Jeffrey's Bay...we'll have to see.
The cast of characters:
-Gavin the bus driver- happy-go-lucky guy with an Afrikaans accent, no teeth on the top, and a full row of shiny teeth on the bottom (dentures?) Which is weird because he appeared to be in his 40's. But anyhow, he was sporting a robust beer boep, complete with a tight and slightly holey t-shirt. Opening line to the passengers: "Hello guys! I just want to tell you my bus is the LOOOVE bus, because we all talk to each other and make friends!" He then threw in "I'm a BAD bus driver, not a BAZ bus driver" and then laughed very hard at his own joke.
-Lars the brooding German- computer programmer dressed only in black. From Berlin, in SA for 2 weeks by himself on a holiday.
-The Chatty Dutchman- (I didn't catch his name, I was too busy trying not to get trapped into a 2 hour long conversation) who was wearing a sparkly, brown plaid fedora and to go with his thick brown sideburns. I swear I'm not exaggerating. Spent the last year in Cape Town studying real estate, is going back to Holland soon. I didn't know people studied real estate. It took me most of the day to figure out why his voice sounded so familiar, and then I realized he sounds like Brad Pitt in Troy. I think. He talked so much I had plenty of time to mull it over.
-The Beach Blonde Austraaahlian girl- works at a bridal magazine in Australia, is in South Africa visiting her mom and grandma. Was traveling to Knysna by herself to take a break from her family, who apparently are too slow-paced for her. Unfortunately was trapped sitting up front with Gavin and the chatty Dutchman, but based on the amount she also talks, she definitely held her own. Is dating a surfer.
-The gaggle of German girls- very pale-skinned, animated group that chattered away in German for 4 or 5 hours straight, pretty much the entire time they were on the bus. I unfortunately have no idea what they were talking about or who they were.
-The gaggle of Austraaahlian girls- in SA for their old flatmate's wedding, decided to see a bit of South Africa afterwards. The one I was sitting by is an ex-travel agent for musical celebrities, apparently a very exhausting and stressful job. On their way to Oudtshoorn to see the ostriches.
-Tom Cruise- an American guy who looked and acted a lot like I imagine Tom Cruise would in person. Short statured, with big muscles (to compensate?) and brown spiky hair. From Chicago. Very loud and stereotypically American, but didn't turn out to be that friendly. By the time the bus picked him up, we were 2 1/2 hours late, so I can understand why.
-Possibly stoned couple- white American gangsta-lookalike guy, with an African girl sporting an afro that stood out at least a foot from her head. Again, I'm not exaggerating. Very out of it, fond of leaning against buildings on our gas station stops.
-The not so chatty Dutchman- an 18-year old blonde kid who looked like he was straight out of Orange County, but is actually from Holland. Smokes. Is in South Africa for 5 months, like me, visiting family during his gap year after high school. In his words, he "couldn't take any more school". I told him I felt the same way.
Lots going on, lots to see, but also took forever. The beach blonde Austraahlian girl said that we could have made a reality show about the Spaz (um, Baz) Bus, and she's right. The big drama of the day centered around one particular passenger that we were supposed to pick up in Mossel Bay, but when we got there there was no space for him. So Gavin, being a gracious and accomodating host, seats the sunburned, barefoot man on the floor in the aisle. Buut then he calls the "office" to let them know, and once we're 20 minutes away the "office" informs Gavin that he may lose his job, and therefore must drive the extra passenger all the way back to Mossel Bay. So we drive back, to drop the poor soul off again. The whole time during which Gavin is apologizing profusely and pleading with the passengers not to hate him. But by this time we're over an hour late.
And then leaving sunburned man in our dust, 40 minutes later we reach George. Gavin gets a call that he must now go back and pick up sunburned man AGAIN in Mossel Bay, because the "office" doesn't want to have to pay for him to stay an extra night. So Gavin left us in George to fend for ourselves, and drove back for a second time. Thank goodness we didn't have to go along for the ride, or Gavin may have had a mutiny on his hands. The whole point of a bus trip is to go TOWARDS your destination, not AWAY from it! But anyway, along with the chatty and not so chatty Dutchmen, the beach blonde Austraaahlian girl, and a few others I went to have dinner at Nandos, a chicken place. Which ended up working out, because we could all chat. And also, by then, I was in desperate need of a cup of tea, seeing as I'm an addict now and all.
Over an hour later, Gavin fiiinallly gets back with sunburned man, and we all load in and we're off! And then we realize that possibly stoned couple was no longer with us. They had accidentally gotten back on the wrong bus, the shuttle that was meant for sunburned man. And we still had their luggage. Suckaas! We didn't go back for them, whew.
So now running 2 1/2 hours late, we then passed the rest of the torturous 5 hours or so of the trip listening to Gavin's favorite CD, Lionel Richie love songs. Terrible, terrible music. Thank goodness for ipods, is all I can say. Eventually, at 10:30 pm, I finally made it to Jeffreys Bay, by which time Tom Cruise was so ansy that he kept shouting things like "ready to go?" or "everybody in?" each time we stopped a hostel and things were moving a little slow for his liking. All in all an entertaining journey, which I will definitely remember for a long, long time.
So there you have it! I'm undecided as to whether I want to take the Spaz bus back to Cape Town at the end of my month in Jeffrey's Bay...we'll have to see.
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